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and I will bitch bout' anything I please.
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retook chinese today.
was so tired that i didn't feel like retaking, somemore it was raining!

i'm so unhappy with my life.
those unfairness, those MCP thinkings and alot alot more!!
i do have alot of complaints bout' them*, just the particular them*!
i'm a spoilt brat whom is being pampered by my family eversince birth.
now, i have to give in and tolerate to people whom i think they ain't worthy of it.
why must i do that?
i don't know.
i'm always the one who works hard in everything and the lazy one always get the credit.
everything is just so fcuked up, hate it when i have this kinda feelings.

and darl will be back tmr. (:
something is still missing.....

ps: names are not mentioned is bcos' i don't wanna any conflicts nor gossiping. just wanna live in peace.

many thought that we wouldn't last till now;
and they were surprised that we are already together for five months.
many find it fast; wow, five months already.
LOL.

went bukit merah to study ytd.
doreen sis and yuqin accompanied me. THANKS!
studied till 5. 7 hours of study only enable me to memorise 2 chaps.
history paper;
confident for the SEQ. i did the qns bout' japan.
i memorised real hard as i don't know bout' that country well; ms chai says that there will be a high possibilty for japan to come out. yeah, it did.
wanted to do china initially. but i only studied the reason for 1911 revolution and not the consequences. haas.
another qns was bout' russia; gorbachev.
for the sbq; i'm not really confident.
was bout' russia part 2, civil war.
ms chai did ask us to read thru' as it might come out for sb.
didn't read thru' and i bluff my way thru' the qns. and it was hard.
but whatever, at least one more paper is over. (:

its friday and suprisingly i'm home.
didn't meet sokwei, too tired to. babe, i will meet up will you real soon okie! missyou(:
took at nap and woke up around 12.
met up with yuqin for supper at the porridge.
slacked awhile and i'm home. (:

five more days..

eli was a good girl today.
woke up early to go for humanes; history revision class.

was late, waited for lijun.
the cab fare for $6 to redhill from my place. first time man!
cos i was waiting for her under her deck for like 20mins?
the uncle complained and chased me down the cab with all the naggings.
giving excuses like he need to drive his family to hospital and blahs.
saying things like he will be at jurong by that time.
hey, c'mon. i'm the one paying for the time, not you.
but nevermind, its our fault.
so i didn't argue. (:

reached school around 1045, lijun's dad drove us there.
got notes, tips and i understand better.
i hafta study later. gonna memorise all the factors and blahs.
my head will burst with all the revoultions, leaders, war, countries and more.
=(

and we took train home! accompanied jun to take train.
she's going to find qian at lil india and she says she's getting bankrupt.
cabbing there will be ex so took train.
there's this boy who board the train at redhill. he's standing so close to me and he's from tanglin special school. freak the hell out of me.
told jun to alight and take the next train. accompanied her to wait.
meanwhile, we were talking about the old us.
looking back, ff really changed loads.
ff was once so pure and innocent.
the nerdy looks when we're in sec one, those netball days. and those fooling arounds.
yeah, netball days.
those scoldings from mr teh which made me scratch my head, those days on court, those day when i'm playing C and WA, those kallang trngs and carnivals, west zone, oss trng every sat mrng at 8 and those team talks after every game.
the most memorable team talk, i still can remember; the one after west zone.
commonwealth and tanglin was even.
and our next match was with mgs; a real tough match.
knowing our standards, the chance of winning is only 50-50, we might not be able to get into next round.
those consoling, those crying and those hugs at pandan reservoirs. awww.
and all of us went back school to have a real team talk with mr teh and the seniors; ade, kiki and many more.
and mr teh is the only one whom i will OBEY and not rebel even he fucking yell at me.
awwww, seriously i miss those times. :(

counting down, 7 more days to go which mean, a week more!

yeah, new skin. (:
anyway, had chemistry paper today.
obviously, i flunked. i know completely nothing about upper sec science. =x a
nd yeah, there's no paper tomorrow.
by right, i can jolly well sleep till noon tmr.
but by left, ms chai is having a class tmr.
gotta go back.
the only thing that motivates me to study is; study hard now and play hard later. (:

well, i admit that i'm so looking forward to his return.
i do do miss him.
i mean, imagine.
your boy is away for like 2weeks plus and you can hardly contact him.
who won't miss him?
unless, you have no feelings. ah, then i will believe.
and i believe, its crap when people say, "i will enjoy my life man!"
yeah, i do enjoy my weekends last week; kinda my life?
but i do miss him.
well, its my choice and decision to scarifice for him.
sometimes i might complain.
but what makes me pissed was that he took things for granted. hmph.
he is always greedy and asking for more of everything. =x
but what can i do? i already fall;
and now i do love him. (:

counting down, 8 more days to go.
misses lots!

PS: the flowers were given long ago. i want more! hee(:

finally, amaths paper is over.
think i flunked it, not the first time anyway. haas.
nevermind. (=
met up with sokwei for some light dinner and guess what?
eli took public transport home. LOL.
alighted at central, saw dom heng, carin and ben.
took train with dom heng, he alighted at buona vista.
alighted at tiong, saw jon.
walked home tgt and smoked. (:

met up with mummy for dinner, had thai cuisine.
yummy. (:
tried the bangkok naked chicken; taste like popeye.
bought a bag, a belt, a sunglass from m)phosis and a dress from RED2 within 45minutes.
happy happy. (=

some parts quite true.

You Are An ENFP

The Inspirer You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends.You are also unconventional, irreverent, and unimpressed by authority and rules.Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives.You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're quite the storyteller! In love, you are quite the charmer. And you are definitely willing to risk your heart.You often don't follow through with your flirting or professed feelings. And you do break a lot of hearts. At work, you are driven but not a workaholic. You just always seem to enjoy what you do.You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist. How you see yourself: compassionate, unselfish, and understanding When other people don't get you, they see you as: gushy, emotional, and unfocused.

met up with my family girls on sat night: geena sis, doreen sis and mabelene sis-in-law.
headed down to boat quay and we went to club rav.
my first time being there. mabelene sis tot of trying as she says the chairs are cute.
well, if you want say it to be a pub or a lounge, then the atmosphere is cozy. (:
if you want to say it as a club, no way.
they play slow music before 12. and the music is nice.
they play R&B aft 12 but with no dj.
after 3, there will be dj. mixed genre. =x
but one thing, the service is good.

bought tidbits. but the stupid waiter, who keep laughing at me and calling me apple, say "no outside food and drinks allowed."
and confiscated them. :(
i was complaining to my cousins and the supervisor saw it.
then, he bought me lollis. happy. hee. (:

we reached there about 10 and we leave around 5am.
woo~ long hours inside that place ehs.
haas. and the four girls finished a bottle of chivas, 2 jugs of berburm coke(not sure of the spelling) and 2 happy jabs of v0dka cranberry each.
crazy right. LOL.

and the dj over there kept disturbing me with the smoke from the dance floor.
as we were sitting just right beside the dance floor, the smell of the smoke is so strong that i can't stand it. so, i pinched my nose.
the dj saw it i guess and that explains why he will try to get my attention and then, press the button for the smoke on purpose and smiled. argh!
and i saw him when we're about to leave at the entrance smoking.
he was silly enough to crap. haas.

dj: where you going?
me: home.
dj: so early go home alr?
me: yar, we are here for like 7 hours eh.
dj: wah, never call me earlier then i come down find you.
me: haas, bye. *thinking as though i got your no and i know you. LOL.

my cousins seem to know what i'm thinking and laughed. haas.
though the place is kinda bored, enjoyed it though.
cos why?
girls nights out! LOVETHEM! (=

always the dear ones who'll be there for me: d0reen sis, me, geena sis, mabelene sis. (from left)

lovin' it. looking forward to more girls out like this. hoorray!

11 more days to go..

today is just not my day.

- :(
firstly, i flunked my practical. well, i mean physics.
i ought to do well as i had done it before. i forgot the steps and only till the last five minutes, i realised my mistake.
one word; careless. heckk.

- :( :(
as i'm in the first shift, i was quarantined for four hours in the amphitheatre.
feeling so uneasy all over. and the only thing that perks me up was the fast game with minhan;
we smoked behind the amphi and it take nothing more than a minute for us to finish one stick.
wakeup call i can say.

- :( :( :(
quarralled with my mum. she washed my pants without asking. and i intend to wear the pants tmr. well, i was asked to accompany my godsis to WCP with her school. and that black pants is the only pants that i have. the rest are way too short AND i bought the pants cos' of darl's parents. i do have pants that are of knee length but it's gonna be like freaking hot.
so, no way!

- :( :( :( :(
darl had not contact me for the whole of today.
he's having outfield and damn the place, no reception thou' he has roaming, FUCK.
miss him.

- :( :( :( :( :(
and worry for him too. he says its dangerous in certain ways as the route there is uneven with holes. and the tank might get stuck or something like that.
dangerous.

- :( :( :( :( :( :(
told a bestie of mine bout the problems i'm facing ytd. she met the rest today and thou' her intention was just to tell another bestie, the rest of the friends were there.
i trust her and that's why i'll tell her my problems. yet, i feel betrayed and disrespected.
messaged her, with no intentions of starting a quarrel or what.
she claims the others weren't listening and apologised.
the last thing she said, "now say what also no use alr", quoted from the message.
disappointed.

today just simply sucks. hate it.
sighs;
14 more days to go...

finally, i met princess. just us. (=
had dinner at sakae, went over to wheelock to collect my cousin's phone and bought birks. (:
her boy came and went slacking together. jos joined too.
the couple went off around 10 and i accompanied jos to wait for his friends.
and he sent me home. thanks for the ride.
and yes, eli is getting fatter. everyone is saying that.
and i will be going on diet SOON! and i will get my belly pierced. haas.

o'levels coming soon and its next mon. and sci pract is tmr. oh man!
think i'm gonna flunk. lalaas.

15 more days..
counting down. and yes, i miss him.(:

did some reflecting and i blamed myself for creating such a misunderstanding.
i'm really sorry and it really hurts me when i realise princess has been hiding these lil things from me. she's the one suffering, and that's not what i want.
i want her to be happy, always wanted her to.
instead so, i add on to her pain without realising.
everything might had changed. however, nothing can change how much princess mean to me.

those happy times..

nd no matter what the future beholds for the four of us, i will still hold on to this very special friendship of you and me.

i promised.

well, i was supposed to sleep.
and i'm home. didn't stay over today. decided to be a goody girl to accompany mummy. XD
couldn't sleep. feel kinda weird, cos he ain't beside me for a good hug.
i know that i always sleep alone too when he's in camp. BUT the prob is, he's out! awww. miss him. hee.
he's over tim's place and what will two guys do when they're tgt? game. -.-"
just wanna let time pass as i'm waiting for him to be home. so, i decided to blog. (:

woke up during evening time and went to cycle and carriage to collect his car.
woo~ his first servicing cost him close to $383.
headed to link hotel for a jap buffet. poor service and the food wasn't very nice. i still prefer the suntec one. grins*
he promised me that he will be bringing me there today but.... sighs. don't wanna talk bout' it anymore.
met tim and amilia at amk and went to hk cafe cos' i was craving for mango pudding. HEE.
the waitress was very naggy. couldn't stand it.
jr0ng and cheryl came too.
we crapped alot and yeah, i'm always their target board.
but nevermind, amilia is more blur. =x

LOVEHIM!(=

woke up at 11am today when i only have six hours of sleep the day before.
TIRED.
accompanied darl to cycle and carriage to service his car. he can only collect his car on tmr late evening. so, we cabbed to wheelock to service my cousin's phone.
darl brought me to have lunch, wasn't very nice. =x
i bought myself ferragamo shine perfume 100ml. contented. XD
he bought for me foundation, concealer and mascara. all these are spare cosmetics that i'm gonna put over his place.
tim came town to meet us.
we went to shop for daily necessities like toothpaste, toothbrush and bath foam. (:
lalalas.
and headed down to marina south for dinner.
cheryl and jos joined. however, cheryl leave halfway. jr0ng came to pick her.

yeah, just feel like blogging. and right now, mrAlvin is snoring away when he is supposed to watch pathfinder.

gonna rest. GOODNIGHTS!

i'm just missing my past a little. those days of my life without any commitments but just fun. those parties and those girls out. those drinking sessions and those heart to heart talks. those weekends of fun and enjoyment. those days that i called my life. i missed those days, when there's happy pills and princesses. i missed those parties. i missed those fun. i missed those happy moments.
despite so, i have no one else to blame but me, myself. i made these choices. i chose him over my life. ilovehim.(: and like what ferlyn said, it ain't the looks that matter. its the way he treats me that matters.

read thru princess' blog and i believe we can walk thru this together. thou we ain't meeting up as often as before, we can't be selfish. both of us will definitely understand. and i'm starting to.
i will just already know how to adapt to the change. for the sake that princess wants me to be happy and i want princess to be happier. it doesn't matter how long have we known each other, its just those understandings that we have. and yes, i have to thank mrEugene. he made me heartbroken and in return, i found princess. no matter what happen, i will hold on to our "princess-ship". (:
anyway, met my lovely girls last friday night. thou the night was short, i love you girls. i enjoyed and famousfive will never be forgotten. looking so forward to the next meeting and maybe, we shall fly to japan and have our next meeting up there! (:

finally, famous five met up on friday. pooled and went kbox after that. xinyi joined us for kbox. uh, i can say. i miss famous five soooooo much. four years in tanglin with em' and one year without em'.
we came together mainly cos' of netball. i knew ferlyn since 8 and we lost contact since 10 cos' i went to a new primary school. kaiyun, lijun, ferlyn and i quitted netball together and sokwei came into the picture as i was close to her in class. we started hanging out in school together and teachers named us the "famous five". mr tham was the one who gave us this name. well, it might sounds childish but who cares.
i missed those days in school during recess, those block smoking sessions after school and those breakfast sessions tgt that caused us to be late for school. those days when we used to meet at central and take 285 to school. they are the ones who will tear with me, share the laugh and get insane together. they are the ones who had seen me change, teared and loved. we seen one another changed and we grow up together.
we had been thru' five years of our life together and girls, i'm still counting on. (:
and anyway, the pictures will be sent to you girls shortly cos' my digi cam is left in his car.